There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
