it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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