I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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