He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
