garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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