The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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