we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
