I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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