I wannas sexs uuuuu
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
