..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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