either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
