i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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