drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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