yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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