It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Randomize