That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
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dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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