No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
this will be a night to untag.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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