my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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