mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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