Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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