So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize