I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Acid is not a monday night drug
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize