I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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