lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
