I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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