i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
