3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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