The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Fuck me I smell like cheese
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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