Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize