that's an acceptable place to lick
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
