I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
