question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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