so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
