The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Randomize
