kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize