we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize