apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
