It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
