are you still at the devil's house?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
