If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
false alarm. still invincible.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
