ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
