do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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