it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
