Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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