come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
