I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize