I'm jealous of your bromance
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Randomize
