That's intense
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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