Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
