i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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